buttononthetop: (Vizzini's Rule - Title)
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Title: Vizzini's Rule, Chapter 58

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: Nope, unless you find male chauvinism really offensive...

Spoilers: Season One thru Out of Time (1x10)

Disclaimer: Torchwood and all its wonderfulness belong to Russell T. Davies and the Mighty Beeb. Just goofin' around! All ©’s to Catherine Tregenna for dialogue and situations borrowed from Out of Time.

Summary: In which Ianto goes shopping...

Notes: Okay, so I’m stuck at work - going on 7:30 now.  :(  So I took a break to reach [livejournal.com profile] teachwriteslash’s brilliant new chapter and decided to see if the firewall would let me post.  If you’re reading this then it worked!  Enjoy!!

Previous Chapters



Vizzini's Rule: Chapter Fifty-Eight

Ianto arrived at the Tourist Office bright and early. He went downstairs to get the coffee going and Jack came out of his office as soon as he heard the door alarm announce Ianto’s entrance.

“Ianto! Good, here are the files on our guests. I need you to make some new IDs for them. I want your best work!” Jack tossed the folder to him and then asked if there was coffee yet.

“Good morning to you too, sir, and no, I just got here.”

“Oh,” Jack said and stared rather blankly at Ianto for a moment. “Right. Good morning. Let me know when the coffee’s ready.”

Ianto stared after Jack as he strode back into his office. He must not have slept at all, Ianto thought sympathetically.

By the time Ianto had finished the new pieces of identification, it was almost eleven o’clock and the rest of the team was working in the Hub, except Gwen whom Jack had sent to fetch their guests.

As they waited, Jack reviewed Ianto’s work. “Nice job, thanks Ianto.”

“You’re welcome,” Ianto replied, glad that the coffee seemed to have mellowed Jack out a bit.

“Hey, do we have any pastries?” Jack asked.

“No, I didn’t stop this morning. Would you like me to run and get some?”

“Thanks, that would be great. It’s too early for lunch and I feel the need for some sugar. Plus, it would be nice to have something for the others when they get here.”

“I’ll be right back,” Ianto said. He drove quickly to the bakery and back to the Hub. When he returned, he could hear John yelling about something in Jack’s office. He waited as Jack talked to John just outside the door, not wanting to interrupt.

“You’re right,” Jack said quietly. “I didn’t think. You should keep your name.” Jack patted John on the shoulder and then caught sight of Ianto. He murmured something to John who nodded and went back into Jack’s office. Jack walked over to Ianto and grabbed the bag of pastries.

“I need you to run up another set of IDs. This time with their real names,” Jack ordered.

“But Jack, that’s not –”

“Just do it, okay? Without a big long discussion? They’ve been through enough.”

Ianto felt as though he’d been slapped. He stepped back from Jack, his face a careful blank. “Yes, sir,” he said.

Jack sighed. “Thank you. Before you do that though, I need you to take them shopping. Maybe to the ASDA?”

“Sorry, you need me to take them shopping? Whatever for?” Ianto asked, very confused.

“To practice with their allowance and to see what things cost these days. You’re the most sensible of all of us so I thought you’d be perfect. They’re ready now.”

“Okay,” Ianto said slowly. “I’ll go pull my car around.”

“Great,” Jack said and headed back into his office.

Ianto punched the button on the lift with a little more force than strictly necessary. What the hell is wrong with Jack today? he wondered. He’s tired, fine, that’s not my fault, and it’s not my fault the IDs made John mad, it’s Torchwood protocol, so what the hell? Ianto sighed, thinking that the sooner they got their ‘guests’ out from under Torchwood’s wing, the better for everyone.

Diane admired Ianto’s car when they met him outside the Tourist Office. She asked him a few questions about the engine and other technical things, but was disappointed when she realized he didn’t actually know much about his vehicle. He wished Brendan were there to share his vast knowledge of automobiles, Diane would have enjoyed a nice long blether with the young mechanic. As it was, the drive to the ASDA was fairly quiet. Emma asked a few questions at first, but John told her to stop making a pest of herself and, despite Ianto’s assurances that her curiosity was normal and welcome, she didn’t speak again.

The next hour was one of the longest of Ianto’s life. He hated the ASDA under normal circumstances, preferring the small market by his flat, but his charges made it even worse. John seemed to disapprove of everything, Diane was alternately enthralled and bored, and even Emma’s charming enthusiasm for everything from candy to cosmetics began to wear on him after a while. As they were bagging up their purchases, Diane approached him with a concerned look on her face.

“You alright?” Ianto asked.

She held up a pack of cigarettes to show him the warning label. “What does that mean?”

Ianto sighed. “Smoking can lead to lung cancer and emphysema and other nasty things.”

“Really?” she asked.

“Really.”

They loaded their purchases into the boot of Ianto’s car and then headed back to Llwellyn House. Along the way, John spied something told Ianto to pull over. Like I’m his personal chauffer or a taxi, Ianto though sourly. John opened his door and said to Ianto, “I’m just going to take a look at the stadium.” He turned to face the backseat where Emma and Diane were sitting and added in a patronizing tone, “You girls stick together now. I’ll be back for supper.”

After Ianto had pulled away, Diane muttered, “I suppose he thinks we’re to get supper for him.”

“Not bloody likely,” Ianto said and they all laughed. Having John out of the car had lightened the mood considerably. “No, John has to learn what it means to live in the 21st Century.”

“And that means getting his own supper?” Emma asked.

“Indeed it does. Here we are then,” Ianto said as he pulled up in front of the house. “I’ll just help you get your purchases inside and then I’ll leave you to it.” Ianto grabbed John’s bags, noting that he just assumed someone would do it for him. Not unlike Jack today, Ianto thought peevishly and then immediately felt guilty about the comparison. He reminded Diane and Emma about how to use the mobile phones they’d been given, just in case, and headed back to the Hub.

When he arrived in the Tourist Office, the wall was just beginning to swing open. Owen came through and nodded to Ianto on his way out the door. Ianto hesitated, torn between going downstairs to see if Jack was in a better mood and avoiding him altogether. He deliberated for so long that the wall swung shut again. Taking that as a sign, Ianto went to his office and set to work on the second set of identifications for their guests.

He had almost finished Diane’s passport when he heard the wall swing open again. He stepped through the beaded curtain to see Jack striding towards the door.

“Trouble, sir?” he asked.

Jack stopped with his hand on the door and turned to face Ianto. “You just left him out there on his own,” he said accusingly. “I trusted you to look after them.”

Ianto was stunned. “Who? You mean John?” When Jack nodded brusquely, Ianto continued, “He told me too! Practically demanded that I pull over so that he could tour the stadium.”

“Well he’s not there now. He’s at a pub with no idea how to get home again. He said he was afraid to call a taxi because he didn’t know how much money he’d need.”

Ianto bit his lip to keep from apologizing. This is not my fault, he thought to himself. He reached for his keys and said, “Where is he? I’ll go and fetch him right now.”

“No need, I’m going. It’s just…” Jack voice trailed off. “Never mind. Those ID packages ready?”

“Almost.”

“Good. I… Thanks, Ianto. I’ll be back later,” Jack said as he hurried out the door.

Still wondering just what the hell was wrong with Jack, Ianto returned to his office and got back to work.

TBC in Chapter Fifty-Nine
 

Date: 2008-09-20 01:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Hé chérie, thanks for take time for update. I really love the way you write this, is great to read about what we don't saw at tv. Read you and listen Melody Gardo sing for me (she's sooooooooooooooooo good, excellent blues singer), well, read you at the end of the day is one my favorite moment. I think chocolate is it teach best friend and Vizzini's Rule is perfect bed time story ;)Prends soin de toi ma belle

Date: 2008-09-20 04:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
Mmmm...chocolate.... :D Hope you're feeling better chérie!

Date: 2008-09-20 01:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] etmuse.livejournal.com
Ooooh... poor Ianto... he really just can't win can he?

Date: 2008-09-20 04:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
Not for a while, nope. :(

Date: 2008-09-20 02:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] christine-twfan.livejournal.com
And some days I want to slap Jack. *sigh* He really can be overbearing.

Date: 2008-09-20 04:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
Oh yes he shore can! *slaps Jack* Everyone else is! :D Happy Friday!

Date: 2008-09-20 02:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] teachwriteslash.livejournal.com
Awwww you called my chapter brilliant!!!

In the mood to slap something.

Picks Jack ***************slap************

Date: 2008-09-20 04:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
Well it was! :D

Sorry you feel slappy. Glad I could give you a reason to take it all out on Jack. ;)

Date: 2008-09-20 02:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dragynville.livejournal.com
Oh oh, Jack better check the attitude at the door or he may wind up in the doghouse. 0.0 It's all well and good to be upset, but he's blunting the edge on Ianto.

Date: 2008-09-20 04:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
Absolutely! As my mother used to say to me (a lot), he better watch his tone of voice! Can't you just hear him getting all snippy there at the end? *slaps Jack* Poor Ianto... *hugs Ianto*

Date: 2008-09-20 03:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thrace-adams.livejournal.com
Just so everyone knows I started the whole *slaps Jack* trend :) And yeah, for this chapter...*slaps Jack* nope, that's not good enough *stomps on Jack's foot* Poor Ianto, he can come to my house, I'll comfort him, make him forget all about mean old Jack *hugs Ianto*

You know what I loved about this chapter...oh...*slaps John too*

Date: 2008-09-20 05:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
Yes you did!! I have the beta'd fic to prove it!! You get first slap after every chap sweetie. *hugs*

OOoo! Foot stomping too? And from Cave-Buffy again! Poor Jack. *grins* He totally had it coming, didn't he? Ugh - off to bed. Hopefully will get to work some more on ficcage tomorrow. Roomie going away for weekend. Me time!! :D

Date: 2008-09-20 06:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ishouldntreally.livejournal.com
Poor Jack. Nothing a good slap can't fix though :)

Date: 2008-09-21 02:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
*slaps Jack*

...waits...

Hmm, he's still being a jerk in 59. :( Oh well, I'm bringing in a new OMC to take Ianto's mind off of stuff...he'll be here soon. :D

Date: 2008-09-20 07:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hab318princess.livejournal.com
Poor Ianto, all confused!

You are catching their voices so well and I'm looking forward to part 59!

Date: 2008-09-21 02:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
Oh thank you so much!! That's one of my favorite things to hear. :D

Date: 2008-09-20 08:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] angelzbabe1989.livejournal.com

*bitch slaps Jack a few times for good measure*

Stupid Man - how dare he treat Ianto that way!! Grrrr....

*huggles Ianto*

Date: 2008-09-21 02:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
Right there with ya sistah! I must admit, I'm channeling some ex-boyfriends to get Jack to the perfect level of jerkiness. Hey! They were actually good for something! ;)

Glad Ianto's getting lots of huggles, tho. :D

Date: 2008-09-20 09:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] doctor-addicted.livejournal.com
Gosh, Jack's pretty much out of it, isn't he. I guess John's fate is getting to him on more levels than one: John's being out of his time, alone and having lost his family for good... Still, I wish he'd let Ianto in on it, at least a bit :(

Date: 2008-09-21 02:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
Yeah, I'm looking forward to Season 2 when Jack starts to open up a bit. It's hard to write him in so much pain and refusing to let anyone help. Especially since it hurts Ianto so much too! *huggles boyz*

Date: 2008-09-20 09:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] greenwyvern.livejournal.com
I actually liked thrace's solution of stomping on Jack's foot so... *stomps on Jack's foot REALLY hard* Yeah, he really needs an attitude adjustment here. I understand that he's upset but it's so not fair to Ianto to take it out on him. Always before, Ianto has been a comfort to Jack; but Jack needs to understand that he can't take the younger man for granted, just treat him anyway he wants to and then go back to him when it's convenient. The way you've written Ianto's POV of the last few chapters, it sounds as if he's starting to feel used and no matter how he feels about Jack, he'll only be able to take that for so long, because Ianto Jones is no one's bitch! He's been through too much emotionally (Canary Wharf, Hiding Lisa, Lisa's Death) to ever let anyone take him for granted for too long; he may put up with it for a while but something is bound to make him snap eventually.

On Jack's side, man is he wrapped up in himself or what right now? You actually have done a splendid job of reflecting what was going on in the episode, in terms of Jack's preoccupation with the other time travelers and with John in particular; it's obvious that he's emotionally projecting the confusion and disorientation he felt when he was first abandoned by the Doctor and left alone to struggle, displaced in a time not his own. I can see you building up to why Jack sat in the car with John when he committed suicide and I know that bit will be brilliant by the time you get there!

:-)
GW

Date: 2008-09-21 02:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
Ianto Jones is no one's bitch! Amen!!

Yeah, Ianto's sympathy is fading to annoyance as we go along. There are only so many excuses you can make for letting someone stomp all over your heart. (wow, went to a Country Song there for sec!)

Thanks so much for your lovely words. I was really worried that I was just making Jack sound like a big baby and not like he's really going thru something. It's so hard sometimes since I'm just doing Ianot's POV. I can't have Jack justify himself with his thoughts. :( But I'm thrilled to hear it's working! :D

Thanks hun!!

Date: 2008-09-20 09:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] criccieth.livejournal.com
Agree with Greenwyvern - you show where Jack's coming from (building up on the show's clear portrayal of Jack's identification with john) and show on top of that how, as he can't actually make himself admit to the team why he's feeling this way, he takes all his feelings out on the "safe" target: Ianto. After all, he'd never treat Tosh that way (he always seems to regard Tosh as the fragile one in that sense), he knows damn well that Owen and Gwen would bite back and he assumes, if he thinks about it all, that Ianto will just forgive and forget.

oh God how nasty is he going to get when he brings John's body back? After all, it's Ianto's car, and it takes Ianto a while to realise the keys are missing....

Date: 2008-09-21 02:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
*nods* You always hurt the ones you love. Jack's gonna have some serious making up to do. Can't wait to get to write that part!! :D

Date: 2008-09-21 08:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] criccieth.livejournal.com
"you always hurt the ones you love the most
It's a kind of back-handed compliment"

My husband used to use that quote in the early days, usually when he'd hurt me so badly (emotionally, I hasten to add) I was on the verge of leaving him.

The shit you put up with when you have self-esteem issues beggers belief, looking back....

Date: 2008-09-20 04:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] unrequited1984.livejournal.com
Should I even bother saying it? Yes, I think I should. *slaps Jack* C'mon Jackie Boy wake up and smell the yummy organic free trade coffee (which I'm sure Ianto uses). That boy is gonna get fed up mighty quick with this kind of treatment, and I feel the need for a mechanic coming on! (Gee I didn't even know I could do a southern accent in typing but I guess I can). Good chapter!

Date: 2008-09-21 02:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
Hee - I'm measuring the sucess of each chapter by how many times Jack gets slapped. :) Thanks!! And yes, Ianto is reaching his breaking point with Jack's shit here very soon.

Date: 2008-09-20 07:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] butterflycell.livejournal.com
**glares at Jack** I fully understand how hard all of this is for him, but this is in NO WAY Ianto's fault! *fumes*

Stupid men... Sometimes, I'm alarmed that Ianto has XY chromosomes...

loved it though!

Date: 2008-09-21 02:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
Exactly! Men!! *rolls eyes*

Glad you enjoyed it even tho Jack's a moron! :D

Date: 2008-09-20 11:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cjharknessgirl.livejournal.com
*hugs Ianto*

*scolds Jack and slaps him* I know he's having a hard time but still that is no way to treat Ianto.

Great chapter, I think you captured the episode brilliantly!

Date: 2008-09-21 02:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
Thank you!! I'm glad I'm doing it justice, it's so emotional that I didn't want to short change it even tho I didn't really like it that much. Not enough Ianto or Tosh!! :D

Date: 2008-09-21 06:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] angst-queen-98.livejournal.com
Oh man. :-( *huggles Ianto* Jack had best be prepared to make amends! *glares at mean!Jack*

Date: 2008-09-22 02:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buttononthetop.livejournal.com
Yeah - I think Jack's amends will be very serious!! :D
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